


Hunting Season

by all-i-need-is-destiel (Aleakim)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bad Pick-Up Lines, First Meetings, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-26
Updated: 2016-05-26
Packaged: 2018-07-10 10:07:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6978961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aleakim/pseuds/all-i-need-is-destiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Dean meets a hot guy at a bar and accidentally blurts the worst pickup-line right into his face.”</p><p>_</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hunting Season

**Author's Note:**

> **prompt by Anonymous:** “The other day I saw an old post where Dean was like “Hi! I’m a hunter and it’s ’‘you” season’’ and Cas, all confused, was like “not sure if flirtation or a threat”. I laughed much more than I should have. Could you write something with that?”
> 
>  **author’s note:** Somehow that little story did not take the direction I intended but I really hope you don’t mind :)
> 
> _

“C'mon, brother!”

“You’re annoying, you know that?”

“I’ve been told.” Benny grins wide and unashamed before he slaps Dean’s shoulder with way more force than would be necessary. “Look at that girl, man. She’s practically undressing you with her eyes.”

He points at the bar again where a brunette Goddess tried to get Dean’s attention for the last ten minutes. At first she threw him meaningful looks and smiles and now she’s basically naked. At least the small top she wears barely covers her boobs.

And a few years ago Dean would have been all over that. Hell, he’d probably have bought her her third drink by this point or even have taken her to his apartment to have a good time.

But now?

He really doesn’t feel it.

It’s been all fun and games in his twenties but he turned fucking thirty-seven about a month ago and he just can’t keep on going like that. All his friends are settling down, marrying and getting children and he’s sick and tired of being the unattached guy who doesn’t keep a woman or man in his bed for too long.

And Benny knows all of that very well. Maybe even better than anyone else because Dean sure as hell doesn’t talk with Sam about that stuff since his brother would transform into an overeager dating-adviser and set up some blind dates with colleagues and acquaintances of his before Dean even would have drunk his morning coffee.

And Benny’s trying to help in his own way. And it surely isn’t his fault that he’s crap at this and thinks you could meet your dream girl or guy in a shady bar with bad lightning since he met his wife in a place like this. And yeah, he’s the lucky exception.

“Look at that chick,” Dean says through gritted teeth. “She just wants sex.”

“And what’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing,” Dean states firmly. “Absolutely nothing. Hell, we all want our fair shade of fun, right? And it would be fun, I’m sure of that. But in the morning …” He sighs deeply. “Always the _adiós_ , my friend. I’m sick and tired of that.”

Benny watches him quietly for a while, obviously contemplating if his friend seriously decided to change his ways, and in the end he just smiles slyly. “If you’re serious about this, then we need to alter a few things.”

“Dude …”

“First of all, you’re right,” Benny interjects. “That girl definitely just wants to have a good time. She’ll find someone else in no time.” He shoots Dean a glance. “But the guy at the bar is an entirely different case.”

Dean blushes slightly since Benny obviously noticed Dean ogling that man since he arrived twenty minutes ago. At first he couldn’t help himself because the guy looks seriously out of place. Rumpled suit, trench coat and a lost-puppy look on his face. Dean really thought he just took the wrong turn when he watched him entering the establishment, looking confused. But instead of vanishing again, he walked straight to the bartender and ordered a beer.

And now he’s sitting at the bar, studying his drink as if he’s not sure what to do with it and still looking downright lost.

And he’s _absolutely_ gorgeous.

Dean doesn’t say this often about guys because most of the time it just doesn’t feel right. But this stranger is hot and sexy and endearing and just … _gorgeous_.

“See, that guy isn’t looking for a good time,” Benny continues. “He probably had a rough day at work and needed a drink. I’m positive he could use a nice chat too.”

He watches Dean expectantly.

And he can’t help but agree with him. The man definitely doesn’t look like the type Dean used to pick up in those places before. There’s no smile, no open invitation to flirt, no eye contact.

“I don’t know, man,” Dean answers. “He seems like he wants to be left alone.”

“And he’ll probably tell you if that’s the case,” Benny counters. “Just go over there, talk a little bit, flirt a little bit. No harm done.” He smiles encouragingly. “I know you, buddy. You’ll regret it otherwise.”

And yeah, Benny is right. Dean will always wonder what could have been if he doesn’t take matters into his own hands right now.

So he starts to walk, brooding over what he should say to the guy. Normally he starts with a big smile and the offer to buy a drink but the man is staring at his first beer for a fucking eternity now so Dean refrains from that move. Maybe something witty instead? Charming, nice, slightly flirty? Or maybe something simple like, _“Hi, I’m Dean. And who are you?”_

So he stops right next to the guy and blurts, “Hey stranger. I’m a hunter and it’s you-season!”

And … _what_?

Where _the hell_ did that come from?

He read that line in a magazine a time ago, titled “The 10 worst pick-up lines”, and Dean had laughed because it sounded so stupid and lame. So _why the fuck_ is that the first thing that popped into his mind? Does he really not know how to start a normal conversation?

 _Anything_ – absolutely _ANYTHING_ – would have been better than that!

The guy squints his eyes and watches Dean for such a long time that Dean starts to wonder if he even speaks English.

But eventually he asks, “Is that a threat or a flirtation?”

Dean blinks confused. The man really seems sincere.

“Um …” Dean starts hesitantly. “Flirting?”

The guy tilts his head and _God_ , it does something very weird to Dean’s system. Because upfront the stranger is even _more gorgeous_ , although Dean wouldn’t have believed that a few seconds ago. The stubble, the disheveled hair and especially those freaking blue eyes!

“You don’t sound sure yourself,” he states. “It seriously seemed like a threat.”

Dean immediately shakes his head and prays to all the Gods he knows that he didn’t blew his chances with this guy just with a few dumb words. “No, it’s not … It’s just a bad pick-up line. I read it in a magazine and I really don’t know why I thought about it right now and blurt it right into your face –”

“Oh.” There’s understanding in the guy’s eyes. He turns towards Dean, stares at him intently for minutes (or hours?) before he finally says, “I seem to have lost my phone number. May I borrow yours?”

Dean frowns, definitely dumbfounded.

Because he didn’t expect that at all.

“Uh … what?”

The guy looks pained now. “My brother Gabriel told me to use that line if I ever would be in a situation like this.” He sighs. “Although it doesn’t make any sense at all. Why would I need your number when I lost mine? They’re very likely completely different. And why would I lose my phone number in the first place?”

He seems highly confused by all this and Dean can’t help but chuckle. That guy is totally endearing and probably doesn’t even know it.

“They’re just some stupid lines,” Dean tells him. “Don’t think to hard about them, uh …”

“Castiel,” the guy offers.

Dean smiles brightly. “I’m Dean,” he introduces himself. “And to be fair, your brother probably read the same article as me and tried to mess with you. I doubt he expected that to work.”

Castiel sighs. “That sounds like Gabriel, yes.”

“What else did he tell you? _There’s a party in my pants and you’re invited_?” Dean grins. “ _You better have a license because you’re driving me crazy_?”

Castiel’s following expression makes it very clear that his brother suggested these lines as well. “Gabriel is a menace,” he simply states.

Dean laughs. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

Castiel nods before he goes back to stare at Dean as if he can see right into his freaking soul. It should be uncomfortable and weird but for some reason Dean can’t make himself to look away. His heart pounds loudly in his chest and Dean just hopes that Castiel can’t hear it.

At last Castiel summarizes, “You came over here with the intention of flirting and having intercourse later this night, am I correct?”

Dean blushes furiously because again, he didn’t expect that words. In the presence of this guy he feels hundred different emotions, squirming inside him, driving him nuts.

“Um … no,” he finally answers. “I just … I just saw you and … wanted to talk to you.”

He knows it sounds lame but it’s the truth. Well, part of it. Telling Castiel that he’s fucking stunning and Dean felt drawn to him like a moth to the flames wasn’t that good of an idea.

“So you are not intending to have intercourse with me?” Castiel seems disappointed and Dean feels his pulse racing. Part of him tries to convince himself to just drop it, take the guy home and ravish him like he never did someone before. His body is definitely on board with the idea, no doubt about that. It would be great and fantastic and Dean would love every second of it.

But then there would be the _adiós_.

And Dean really doesn’t want there to be an _adiós_.

“Um … listen,” he says. “I’m seriously not saying that I don’t want … well, um, _that_. I wouldn’t have tried to flirt with you otherwise. But I’m too fucking old for some random hook-ups and if that’s all you want then –”

“I’d like to have some coffee with you,” Castiel interjects, looking at him intensively.

“Uh … what?” Dean feels like his head is spinning.

Castiel flushes slightly. “My sister Anna suggested that line if I would ever be in a situation like this. In hindsight I should rather have listened to her than my brother.”

Dean blinks a few times before he starts to laugh. “Yeah, you really should have.”

“So?”

“Um, coffee sounds nice.” Dean smiles. “But how about a drink first? Since we’re already here?”

Castiel beams and it’s probably the most beautiful thing Dean ever witnessed. How is he supposed to survive this?

“And you should tell me everything about that Gabriel,” Dean says, distracting himself before he blurts out something embarrassing again.

Castiel rolls his eyes. “That is going to take a while.”

Dean shrugs. “I’ve got all the time in the world.”


End file.
